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what a rollercoaster this week has been so far!

Bad and bad, to start with - Char's cancer is still growing, fuck it all... more chemo to come, maybe interfering with coming over to London in October - goddess, i hope not! she was, understandably, upset.. damned if i know how she copes. i cried but not when she could hear me...
Took her a couple of days to get her feet again.. woulda taken me a lot more - her courage and good humour are astounding...
'shall i compare thee to a summer's day?' this lady is all kinds of brave - can you hear me, James?
what can i do? nothing. what can i say? nothing. so i make my little jokes and we laugh, i read some peotry to her, Shakespeare's Sonnets we talk about and i read some of Elizabeth Barrett Browning's Sonnets from the Portuguese and other poems - that wonder Pan God one, that has such a wonderful cadence to it... she liked that... [must see if i can record here].
now if we can only get James to put some on CD... damn that man's voice could fuck a moose on a hillside...[green eyes seven foot from the ground, huh?] and everything inbetween for good measure and maybe even me... maybe
so we talk for a couple of hours and then again the next day and things are evening out a little, doesn't rip open our hearts quite so much. i just want to go and move in and look after her and Rob [his heart's not so good and it's worrying her], take it easy, Nephew...

but at least the days pass and it takes us closer to Oakland, which we will have. and today it is that much closer still, only 23 days now... i console myself i will see my lovlies there and i will see Charlotte as much as i can. i must email Vic and talk to her, now Kat's coming too, we can take some turns with Char and the Chariot but if what i think will happen with the disabled queues going to photo-ops and such, Vic and Kat can share? then they won't be split up for so long and we will be right on their heels so will have more time together when that's done...

Phone's ringing... Hello, darling! how are you? been sleepin' some - good, that's helpful.. so we catch up and find out what has been happening... i crack a few jokes and make her laugh and we talk about James.. of course.... and then i start singing, badly and we crack up again, 'ah sweet mystery of life' the old Jeanette McDonald/Nelson Eddy classic - and how did she hit high 'C' and smile so much..? Nelson's hand up her skirt i reckon... nah, that would just make me squawk!!
that makes us laugh even more....
i have still to work out what i am taking to the Con - quite a few people are already packed but i can't do that just yet as we have to move out of our rooms while they take the asbestos out of our doors.... so have to shift stuff out of my room till its done [about 2 days] and then move back in and THEN think about packing for San Fran...
well, i guess it keeps me from getting bored.... like life with Uberbitch is boring?!!
ok i gotta go make my bed, it's laundry day today... three more to go before Oakland, bloody hell... *sighs happily*
so goodnight, all, see you in Oakland...
*waves* smooches to all...

Comments

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shopgirl2004
Jul. 31st, 2004 11:41 am (UTC)
I don't know Char very well but hope to rectify that in Oakland. My heart broke for her reading your entry. But at the same time it also swelled with the impression that she is such a strong lady and that she is loved by so many people that she will prevail. I'm sending good thoughts her way so that she will be feeling well for Oakland.
Oakland... It's coming around so fast! Are you ready? LOL! I've been ready for 3 months... I'm sending you a PM so be on the look out for it.
*hugs*
-Nic
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